“Though it makes no sense, I’d like to get on the court again. I want the pain that only tennis can provide.” – Andre Agassi
Pain is God’s megaphone to rouse a deaf world. – C. S. Lewis
“(Brooke’s) concerned. She hates I was so upset… that I’m in pain.” – Andre Agassi
“This is why we’re here. To fight through the pain…” – Andre Agassi
“…seek the pain, woo the pain, recognize that pain is life.” – Gil Reyes
‘Cause feeling pain’s a hard way/To know you’re still alive – Barry Manilow
“…let’s go put some pain on your opponents.” – Brad Gilbert
This one is about pain, as reflected in the selected quotes – all taken from Open: An Autobiography - listed above. One would think that the autobiography of a glamorous tennis star, one who ranked at the top of his profession, who owned his own jet, and dated and married famous actresses and tennis stars, would be a fun read. Open is anything but, it’s a morose slog though a life of torture and misery. It seems like Agassi tells us a million times in the book that he hates tennis: “I hate tennis more than ever – but I hate myself more.” And the point of this is?
Of course, this book was not actually written by Mr. Agassi. It was dictated to a ghostwriter whose name won’t be used here to protect his ghostly status. This is an “as told to…” tale in which the Agassi-ghost pair appear to emphasize every painful moment in their character’s life, while minimizing the positive. But then Agassi, clearly, loves his stays in the state of misery: “Rock bottom can be very cozy, because at least you’re at rest. You know you’re not going anywhere for a while.”
It’s not as if Agassi is unaware that he’s a lucky man, “I tell myself you can’t be unhappy when you have money in the bank and own your own plane. But… I feel listless, hopeless, trapped in a life I didn’t choose…” Yes, all of this misery comes from playing a sport of the leisured class. “I’ve played this game for a lot of reasons… and it seems like none of them has ever been my own.” Perhaps he thinks that we’ve all been in complete control of our lives from the moment of birth on, ignoring the comment of John Lennon, “Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.”
Lennon also wrote about pain: “God is a concept by which we measure our pain.” But it never seemed like his music was overtaken by the need to paint his life as a prison of pain. Agassi’s book does so, over and over again. Because Agassi does not like himself much, he can hardly be expected to have nice things to say about his former competitors in the sport. After he said some not-so-nice things about Wimbledon champion Jim Courier, Courier responded, “I’m insecure?” Indeed.
Of course, by the time the reader finally reaches page 384 there’s the to-be-expected happy ending, with marriage and beautiful children and the founding of the Andre Agassi College Preparatory Academy charter school. But what an exhausting march to get there… filled with too much pain and too little hope. Tiring.
This work is the opposite of a life affirming one.
Note: A review copy was provided by the publisher.